If you look at other confident people and think that they are “a natural” at it, think again.
Confidence is a learned skill, period.
The quicker you realize that confidence comes from dedication and practice, the faster you’ll be successful.
Confident people tend to create stronger relationships because they’re not afraid to be vulnerable with others.
Confident people have an advantage in business because they wholeheartedly believe in the products or services they’re selling.
And confident people make the most of their days because they’re not afraid to take risks.
If you want to learn how to exude confidence, buckle up!
Here are 5 things you can practice to become a more confident person:
#5 Ask for feedback on your strengths
Confidence starts with identifying and understanding what you’re good at.
As humans, we tend to be our own harshest critics. So, it’s important to take a step back and ask the family, friends, and peers we trust exactly what our strengths our.
Not sure how to start that conversation? It’s pretty simple.
Shoot out a text, email, phone call, or a simple in-person ask and say, “Yo, Phil… What am I good at?”
I guarantee that you’ll be flattered by the responses you get!
Here’s what one of my friends said my strengths were:
- You have the ability to just figure stuff out
- You’re good at the first 50% of establishing relationships
- You can create awesome visuals and content that get engagement
To be honest… At first, #2 was a slap in the face for me.
I wasn’t sure what the “first 50% of establishing a relationship” meant, so I pried for a little bit more information.
Essentially, my friend was trying to say that I was great at creatively connecting with people but that I struggled with creating lasting relationships with people.
Rather than look at the downside of this, I realized how cool it was that he applauded me for my ability to start relationships.
Why? Because starting a new relationship is often times the hardest part!
With his feedback, I not only had more confidence to start more relationships but also the confidence to work on making those relationships meaningful and durable.
Asking for feedback is one of the best things you can do for yourself.
Learn what you’re good at, play to your strengths, and let your strengths build momentum in your life.
In the wise words of Gary Vaynerchuk, “Go all in on your strengths.”
Your strengths will start to work wonders for your personal confidence.
#4 Write down something you’re grateful for every day
The best way to learn about confidence is to study people you look up to (because you usually look up to them for their confidence in a specific topic).
One thing I’ve noticed since studying the people that I look up to is that they take time each day to be grateful for something.
Even if they’re having the worst day imaginable, these people always do their best to find the silver lining in situations.
Long day at work and didn’t get your to-do list done? Be grateful for the opportunity to work at a job that pays you for the work you do!
Bad wifi in the airport? Show gratitude that you have the luxury of downtime from the always-on nature of social media.
The small things that you can be grateful for today will become the big things you find joy in later in life.
Get a pen and a notecard, stick them by your bed, and write down something you’re grateful for every morning/night.
At the end of the week, re-read what you’ve written so that you can keep things in perspective as you start a new week.
Over time, this routine will give you the confidence during tough times to always put things into perspective.
#3 Train yourself to exercise at least 15 minutes a day
I’ll admit it… I fail at this one a lot of the time.
But if we’re being honest, we all have an extra 15 minutes of our day that we waste doing aimless tasks.
We spend over 2 hours every day scrolling through our social media.
We spend too many hours per week watching our favorite shows.
And most of us probably waste some time on the toilet while scrolling on social media and/or watching Netflix (not sure how this is possible, but I know there’s someone out there who’s done it).
If you truly sit down and audit your days, you’ll find more than enough time to set aside for 15 minutes of exercise.
And when you do, your confident will start to sky rocket!
According to Livestrong.com, “While you’re boosting your energy levels, oxygen capacity, muscle tone and general fitness, a side benefit [of exercising] is an increase in self-esteem.”
If you want to start becoming more confident, train yourself to get active even if it’s just for 15 minutes a day.
#2 Practice the art of communication
You’ve probably been in a group of people and someone tells a story that falls completely flat.
Sure, it may have actually been a hilarious or super enthralling story. But for some reason the person just couldn’t control and entertain the group with their storytelling.
In my opinion, no one is a bad storyteller. But, some people absolutely lack the confidence to tell compelling stories.
It’s the classic case of, “I promise it was a lot funnier if you were there.”
This is exactly why, in my opinion, communication is an art.
The good news for you? Art can be learned and we all get our own canvas to experiment with.
No two people talk the exact same, have the same mannerisms when speaking, or have identical personalities.
We each have the ability to tell stories our own way; we just have to practice to make it engaging and compelling for others to listen to.
For example, my confidence in storytelling came when I was launching a new business.
Was I the most confident speaker at the time? Absolutely not.
But, I forced myself to start doing weekly Facebook Live videos so I could get better.
Slowly, I became more confident in front of the camera, began to believe in my own content more, and before I knew it I was doing impromptu videos without content written about beforehand.
At the end of the day, becoming a good orator takes practice.
If you want a tangible way to become a better speaker, get in front of a mirror for five minutes a day and just talk to yourself.
You’re going to feel goofy, but I promise that it works.
Give yourself a complete recap of yesterday or tell yourself the story of one of your favorite memories.
Hell, if you can’t think of anything to talk about then just make up a story!
Practice the way you communicate because the more you do, the more confident you’ll be when the time comes to wow an audience.
#1 Learn to talk positively about yourself
Probably the most important tip I can offer you is this:
Learn to talk about yourself in a positive light and you’ll naturally become a more confident person.
Belief, in my opinion, is the #1 thing that confident people have that others don’t.
They believe in their dreams and aspirations.
They believe in their products and services.
They believe in their story. They believe in a vision.
Most importantly, they believe in themselves.
The more you can build yourself up throughout the day, the more opportunity you give yourself to believe in the success you’re working towards.
Instead of, “Oh, I’m an idiot,” turn it into “Damn, I know I can do better next time.”
Transform your “That was a dumb mistake” moments into an instance of “What can I learn from this to be wiser for next time?”
You have to program your mind to respond to situations with positive self-talk.
However, the benefits are truly transformative in the long-run as you’ll notice yourself encouraging, supporting, and building yourself up regardless of your struggles.
Confidence is something we all struggle with at times.
Even the best speakers, coaches, mentors, etc. in the world have times of self-doubt and uncertainty.
However, I hope you’re finishing this article with a renewed sense of belief and trust in yourself to become a more confident person.
It takes time.
It takes vulnerability.
But if you’re serious about your success and want to accelerate your personal growth, I encourage you to implement these tips to become a more confident person today.